Success Strategy: A New Perspective

In my last blog, “Turn It Over with Gusto”, I talked about how to turn over your limiting beliefs into more positive, affirming statements.  When you intentionally focus on positive empowering thoughts, they crowd out limiting beliefs and help you move forward and accelerate your goals.

Remember it takes times to create a new habit or way of thinking so keep repeating your positive affirmations daily.  If you’re feeling resistance, it could be that your mind is having trouble “believing” your positive affirmation – consciously or subconsciously.  This requires further work to change your perspective!

Here are 3 things that will help with a new perspective:

1.     Let go of the past & create a new statement for NOW:

Release or let go of the limiting beliefs you have from the past.  This can also work for limiting behaviors that result from a belief.  Create a new statement that will make it easier for your mind to let go of the limiting belief or behavior and create a new perspective on it in the present, NOW. 

To release the past, use the words, “In the past…” or “Until now….”  

For the present statement, use the words, “Now I…..” “From now on….”

“In the past, I was not very good at managing money.”

“Now, I am more aware of my spending habits and keep good records that help me manage it.”

“Until now, I was not comfortable making decisions about money.”

“From now on, I educate myself about my options and feel confident when making decisions about money.”

2.     Ask yourself empowering questions instead of disempowering questions.

Disempowering:  “Why don’t I ever have enough money?”

Empowering:  “How can I be even better at managing my money?” or

“What can I do right now to be even better at managing my money?”

3.     Choose YES or NO

You can also choose to have a new perspective on how you are with money by choosing to say “yes” or “no” to your beliefs or behaviors.

Example:

“I’m saying ‘NO’ to stress and worry over my finances.”

“I’m saying ‘YES’ to being peaceful and happy about money.”

Pick one thing you want to work on and try these tools.  Be persistent and consistent.  Repetition is important.  If you need help identifying a limiting belief and your new perspective, contact me for a free coaching session:  Lois@UnshackledLeadership.com.

Success Strategy: The Gift of Accountability

Do you have a “To Do” list that contains some things that never get checked off?

I’m sure we’ve all been there, done that!  What’s the true impact of this?

One of the classes I took for my coach training referred to these things as “tolerations”.  These are things that people don’t deal with and they just keep “hanging” around in your life, mostly taking up space in your head.  You’re “tolerating” them and not doing anything about them.  They are a form of “clutter”.  This can be in the form of physical clutter, such as, the clothes you never mended, the files you’ve never filed, or the book you never finished, the fence in need of repair, etc.  They can also be mental clutter, such as, not doing something because you are fearful, the person you’ve never forgiven,the diet you started and went off course, the conversation you’ve been putting off, the new career you want to pursue but aren’t doing what you need to do about it, etc. Sometimes, physical and mental clutter gets intertwined into quite complex tolerations! 

Tolerations zap your energy!  Having tolerations are like trying to fill a cup full of holes with water.  You keep putting water (your energy) in and it just goes right out the holes, so you’re never full.  When you start “plugging the holes” by addressing these tolerations or being accountable for what you say you’ll do, you’ll begin to notice you have more “energy”.  You actually start being more motivated and productive vs. spinning your wheels with tolerations.  You also become “proud” of yourself which increases your self confidence. 

Give yourself the Gift of Accountability.  Make a list of things you’re tolerating.  Each day, select one thing and do it.  If it can’t be completed in one day, you have at least begun.  Beginning is half done!  Continue.  Step back and give yourself a pat on the back.  Sometimes it helps to have an accountability partner or a coach.  If you want some expert help with accountability, give yourself the gift of accountability and contact me at Lois@UnshackledLeadership.com.  We can brainstorm what’s possible to keep you moving forward and have the success you want! 

Leaders - What's Your Story?

One of the most popular children’s books is The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper.   If you’re a parent or grandparent, you’re probably saying, “Oh, yes, my kids/grandkids love that!”  I love it to.  For those not familiar with the story, when the red train full of toys breaks down, the Little Blue Engine is asked to take over and pull the train up the mountain to the boys and girls.  The Little Blue Engine is skeptical and says,   “I’m not very big.  And I’ve never been over the mountain.  But I’ll try.”

This story has some great insights.  The Little Blue Engine had some beliefs – You have to be big enough and have experience to get over the mountain.  How many of us have those beliefs or stories that hold us back?  These are often called Limiting Beliefs.  Sometimes they are a fallacy or an excuse, sometimes a way to avoid doing something, usually an uncomfortable something.  There are things that we believe are true, we accept them as facts and live our life accordingly, sometimes, even unconsciously. 

Let’s see what this might look like for you as a leader in business or, even, in your family. 

Here are some beliefs people might have:

No pain, no gain.

Money doesn’t grow on trees.

You have to work hard to succeed.

It takes money to make money.

The pie is only so big.

There is too much competition.

I was raised that way.

Only certain people are born to be successful.

That’s how we’ve always done it so it must be right.

More excuses:

I’m too busy to … (ie. make sales calls)

I’m too old, young to….

I’m not experienced enough to do ….

I’m not good at ….

Do any of these beliefs sound familiar to you?  Are they holding you or someone you know back from accomplishing what you want? 

Now that you have some awareness of Limiting Beliefs or “Stories”, let’s learn a lesson from the Little Engine That Could.  While he had a belief that he may not be big enough or experienced enough to make it over the mountain with the train full of toys, he decided to “try”.  He didn’t let his limiting beliefs hold him back!  He said, “I think I can.  I think I can!”  And when he made it to the top of the mountain and all the boys and girls were cheering, he smiled and seemed to say, “I thought I could.  I thought I could!”

What’s your story?  What’s holding you back?  Are you ready to “try” anyway?  If you need some coaching to get you over the mountain, contact me at Lois@UnshackledLeadership.com  or visit our website www.UnshackledLeadrship.com for some great resources. 

Success Strategy: Responsibility vs. Blame

Have you ever blamed someone else for what’s going wrong in your life?  Here’s a thought, maybe you have but you don’t even realize it.  Have you ever said, “If only…” or “Yes, but….”?  Have you felt like a victim to circumstances?  These are clues that you may be blaming someone or something else for what’s going on in your life.

Let’s take a look at this and how it may be affecting your life and your success.  Once I didn’t get the promotion I wanted.  I was very upset with my boss and while I didn’t realize it, I was blaming her. She didn’t recognize this or that about me, etc.   And I was carrying around the negative emotions that go with it.  Poor me.

Fortunately, I happened to read a book, How to Get What You Want and Want  What You Have by John Gray, where he talked about twelve blocks to success.  One of the blocks was BLAME.  All of a sudden, the light went on for me.  The process of blaming my boss for my lack of happiness and success was preventing me for taking responsibility for my life.  He said, “When you make others or circumstances beyond your control responsible for how you feel about your past, present, or future, you are unable to create the changes you want.  As long as someone else is responsible for how you feel, you forfeit the power to change your life.” 

In reading this, I realized that as long as I was blaming my boss for my lack of success, I was holding on to a belief that I couldn’t create what I wanted because of her!  In essence, she was in charge of my destiny at work. I was giving up my power.  Wow.  That was like pouring a bucket of cold water over my head.  Enough of that!   I wanted my power back.  I realized I needed to take responsibility for me. 

In taking responsibility for yourself, you gain the power within to heal and let go of the pain. We need to move on and bless the person or circumstance.  Forgiveness is letting go of the tendency to hold others responsible for our plight in this world. When people feel powerless to get what they need, they get stuck in blame.  It’s easy to be a victim. 

This is something that seems obvious when you hear it but not so obvious while you’re in the muck of it. This is what’s powerful about having a coach.  Someone outside your situation and “story” about the situation can help you see things differently.  When you stop blaming, forgive and take responsibility for yourself, your power to create and be successful will grow.  If you realize you are stuck and need some coaching, contact me at Lois@UnshackledLeadership.com.  At Unshackled Leadership coaching, we help leaders get “unstuck” so they can get their businesses “unstuck” and realize the success they want and deserve.  For more information, go to our website www.UnshackledLeadership.com

Leadership Strategy: BE HAPPY!

Doesn’t it feel great when you’re happy!  Do you ever feel happy for no reason? 

Recently, I attended a conference where a featured speaker was Marci Shirmoff, the author of Happy For No Reason, 7 Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out.  She had so much great information to share.  We all left feeling happy!

I was reminded of the power of laughter and smiling.  These two things can quickly give you a “10” on the happiness scale.   Take a moment right now and put a big smile on your face.  If you’re near a mirror, look at your smiling face.  Don’t you feel great!  Now, start laughing and see what happens.  Smile at others and laugh with others and you will get an even bigger boost of happiness.  Try it!

“Laughter is the best medicine!”  There have been many studies that show the benefits of laughter, physically, mentally and socially.  It can boost your immunity, lower stress hormones, decrease pain, relax your muscles and prevent heart disease.  Who knew?!

An inexpensive way to keep yourself healthy!

As a leader, let’s focus on how laughter can benefit you and your team.  It enhances teamwork, strengthens relationships, attracts us to others, promotes group bonding and helps defuse conflict.  Laughter improves your mood, adds joy to your life, reduces anxiety and fear, and increases resilience.  It can keep you positive and optimistic, even during difficult times. 

Laughter is contagious so use it as a tool with your teams.  You can start your meetings with a joke or a funny video or cartoon.  Of course, all of this is done tastefully.  Laugh at yourself or situations to help lighten up.  Surround yourself with people and things to help you smile and laugh; such as, a fun screen saver, a toy on your test, or a photo of a loved one smiling at you.  Incorporate laughter, fun and playfulness in your brainstorming sessions and see creativity soar and ideas blossom.  Pay attention to children and emulate them.  They are experts on laughing, playing, and talking life lightly. 

Run your own experiment this week.  Be intentional about being happy.  Smile at yourself and others.  Laugh and have fun.  Be happy for no reason!  Then see what kind of a week you and your team have.